Carrying Their Stories: The People Who Shaped Me
- Becky Montes
- Mar 17
- 5 min read
2020, a disastrous year for most, myself included. Besides the global pandemic that shut down basically… everything, I suffered two devastating losses, my aunt and my grandpa. Two
people I looked to for inspiration, whose legacies I hope to carry forward.
While they influenced my life in different ways, both shaped the person I am today and the fighter I have become. Their stories are very different, but both continue to stay with me. The two stories below explain why.
Why "Paper Planes" By M.I.A. is my Walkout Song
While training for my first fight, I got the call that my aunt, Isis, had passed. Isis is best described as a light, someone who lit up any room she walked into. She was energetic, always making people laugh, kind, artistic, and just an overall good human being. Her passing was difficult because it was unexpected. While grieving, I had the responsibility of planning and raising the funds for the memorial and funeral. This task was the most difficult thing I had to do, but I did it for her and her memory.
The community I had built through martial arts came together to support me through this difficult time. People shared and raised money for the funeral, reached out to make sure I was doing okay, and became a pillar of strength for me to rely on during this time.
Originally, I intended to drop out of my scheduled fight. During the weeks of grieving and funeral planning, I hadn’t trained. I thought there was no way I could get in shape in time to fight. I took some time to think it through. Through the doubt, I remembered the last conversation I had with my aunt. She thought it was so badass that I was training and about to fight and I imagined how much she would have absolutely lost it in the crowd if she had come to my fight. Isis was definitely the type that would be screaming and cheering with full force, the loudest in the crowd. Envisioning that gave me the motivation to continue to go through with the fight. I would do it for her.
On the day of the fight:
Hands are wrapped, all the gear is on. I’m warmed up and waiting in the wings of the stage, locked in and ready for my name to be called. “Paper Planes” by M.I.A. starts playing in the background. Isis’s favorite song. I know this because when I was about 12 or so, I asked her what her favorite song was and instead of answering, she blasted “Paper Planes” in her car. I took this random coincidence as a sign that she was here with me, cheering me on from above. My name was then called and I walked out to the stage with the confidence of knowing she was right there with me. After a hard-fought battle, I won. I decided that from then on, whenever I fight, “Paper Planes” by M.I.A. will be playing as my walkout song.
To this day, hearing the song when I walk out gives me strength and confidence, knowing that in some way she’s right there with me. I picture her by my corner cheering loudly in the crowd and regardless of a win or a loss, I know I have made her proud.
In Loving Memory of my Aunt, Isis Luengas
Lessons From A Traveling Artist
My grandpa played a huge role in shaping the person that I am today. The two of us were very close. We could talk for hours about art, politics, movies, books, history, and life. In my eyes, he was incredibly wise. He had seen so much of the world and experienced so many different cultures that I always found myself captivated by the stories he had to tell.
My grandpa was kind of a hippie. He had long hair and lived as a traveling artist. He believed deeply in pursuing what you love and building a life around it, even if the path wasn't the most conventional one. Since he was constantly traveling, I only got to see him once or twice a year if I was lucky. There was one thing that was always consistent whenever he visited. We went to the movies.
It became our tradition. Usually around Christmas time when he came to visit, we would go to the theater together. Through the theater experience, my grandpa and I shared moments of laughter, sometimes we cried, and we talked for endless hours about the film, how it made us feel, and what it says about society. Watching movies with my grandpa gave me more than great stories, it gave us a way to connect. It's these moments that made me fall in love with the power of good storytelling and its ability to bring people together.
Christmas of 2020 was different. Travel had become difficult because of the pandemic, and my grandpa was in another country. For the first time, he wasn’t able to come visit. Late night on Christmas Day, I got a call from my grandpa’s sister, she informed me that he had passed away due to Covid.
You know when you are a kid and you look up to someone like they are your hero? Someone who shapes how you see the world and inspires the kind of person you want to become? That was my grandpa for me.
He was my hero.
Losing him was one of the hardest things I have ever experienced and the grief hit hard. Through time and reflection, I came to realize that he wasn't really gone. The conversations we had and the lessons he taught me still live through me. One of the greatest lessons he ever taught me was to pursue your passion, even when it’s difficult.
When he first decided to become an artist, people told him he should get a “real job.” Being an artist wasn’t seen as stable or sustainable. In the beginning, he struggled and took small side jobs just to get by, but he never gave up. Over time he built a life doing what he loved most. He traveled all over the world and ended up living in places like Japan, Bali, and Mexico. He created a life for himself that most people only dream about, all because he believed in chasing what inspired him.
As I've gotten older, I've started to see how much that mindset shaped the way I approach my own passions. Because of him, I carry the belief that you should chase the things that inspire you, even if the path isn't completely clear. There are still moments where I wish he was here so we could talk things through. I imagine we would have long conversations about the direction I want to go in life.
My biggest dream now is to become a storyteller. Whether it's through film, writing, or telling the stories of athletes, I want to create the kinds of stories that make people feel something and think differently about the world, just like the way movies we watched together once did.
In Loving Memory of my Grandpa, Pedro Michel.